Funny things kids say

Weight watchers

Last night, my husband made homemade pizza. It is the best. He's only gotten better over time.
Because I'm on the WW diet, I can only stare and drool. I stare for roughly five minutes with that delishiousness whafting up my nose and through my body and I can't take it. I start whining.
Me: "That smells so good! I can't stand diets when you do the cooking!"
My son: "Well, you can't have any. You have to count your points."
He's only 3! He shouldn't know this stuff by heart. Or maybe it is I that is talking about it too much. Doh!

Don't wake me up

The other morning I asked my husband to wake my daughter up and so he went in and started singing to her and she said "Daddy, stop with the singing of that song! I'm trying to sleep here!" And then she pulled the pillow over her head. I had tears streaming down my face I was laughing so hard.

Necklaces for teeth

A little girl came up to my sister when she just got braces and asked, "Are those necklaces for your teeth?" She wanted to try them on...

Nikki Nouse

My name is Nikki. My little sister thought that I had the same name as Mickey Mouse, and she would call me Mickey. When my family finally convinced her that my name was not Mickey, she called Mickey Mouse 'Nikki Nouse'. It took several years for her to stop that.

Dying from the bath

The other night my 3-year-old daughter was in the bath and she yelled at me when she was ready to get out, and after I got her out, she says "Sometimes I feel like I'm dyin', but then you always save me."

Put it in your tummy

We were at dinner a few nights ago and my sister told my boyfriends little girl who is 2 yrs old to put her carrot in her tummy so she pulled up her shirt and tried to put it in there and said it won't go in. It was so funny.

Wrinkles

When I was really little, I was sitting with my grandma and suddenly burst out with, "Grandma! You have breaks in your face!"

Windy

This morning my 3yr old son and I ran into the store.
He said,"Mom, it sure is windy out."
I said, "Why , yes it is."
He said," I sure am going to miss you when the wind blows me away."

Playing with my penis

My son was in his room the other day, being quiet. I asked him what he was doing, and he calls out "playing with my penis."
Wasn't quite sure how to respond to that one, so I thought I'd try to distract him and asked if he wanted to do something with me.
He says "Sure. Do you want to play with my penis?"

You need to poop?

When my son was almost two and in the middle of potty training, we were in line at a store one day. He was used to us asking him if he had to go potty all the time, so he tried it out on me. When we were in the middle of the line, he grabbed the top of my jeans, tried to look down my underwear, and loudly asked, "Mommy, you need to poop?" Yes, it was quite embarrassing!

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