Funny things kids say - 5 random sayings

Here is the full list of funny quotes. These sayings come from the kids at my local school, reader submissions and aggregated from all over the Internet. I'm hoping to make this one of the largest collections of funny kid's sayings around.

You can also add your own sayings, or view 5 random funny quotes!

French kissing

I had the two girls (9 and 2) in the bath together. After the bath, the bigger one announces "She kept kissing me! She stuck her TONGUE in my mouth! And she wiggled it around like a WORM! And she KEPT DOING IT!"
The next day, the little one was doing her best to French kiss *me*. Argh!


Melanie asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six."


"I don't like yoghurt" ... why not? "Because the TV says it has bacteria and bacteria makes me sick"

Snot snacks

"If there are no snacks, and there is no food in the house, that's ok because I can just pick my nose and eat some snot. I love snot!"


Child brought home a half-finished sketch last night, copied from a magazine clipping.
A: "mum, do you think there is anything I could have done to improve my jungle picture?"
M: "I thought you'd only half finished it"
A: "yeah, I'm not allowed to keep working on it at home"
M: "so why ask that if you're not even close to finishing?"
I found it quite odd.