Funny things kids say - 5 random sayings

Here is the full list of funny quotes. These sayings come from the kids at my local school, reader submissions and aggregated from all over the Internet. I'm hoping to make this one of the largest collections of funny kid's sayings around.

You can also add your own sayings, or view 5 random funny quotes!

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Before finding out the sex of my third child, my 8 year old asked, "if it's a boy can we take it back?"

Which is more important?

My Birthday is on Mother's Day AGAIN this year...My son, just told me " Mommy I can't figure something out, I don't know which is more special, your birthday or Mommy's Day, I am soooo confused!!" Isn't he adorable??

Extinct animals

The other day we all were having an interesting conversation over lunch and my friend who is an animal activist was speaking animatedly about this issue. As she sat arguing with another group member, her kid quipped in between saying, "Mom, humans should never be allowed to shoot extinct animals!"


After my wife’s grandmother died, we explained to our three-year-old that when we went to the funeral home, Grandma would be there, but it would just be her body. My daughter thought for a second and then asked, What about her head?


My 2yo has started telling stories. They are cute.
She always tells us in the evening that it is "getting dark soon" and when she wakes up early we tell her it "isn't morning yet" so she told us how the day progresses - "Dark dark dark morning morning morning the end!"
She also thought going to the doctor was fun. (it was for her baby brother but they have toys there so its still fun)
"Once upon a time I went to the doctor the end!"
Now updated to:
"Once upon a time a little girl went to the doctor the end!"