Tasty chicken
My daughter was eating chicken the other day and commented that "chickens are really cute when they are alive and really tasty when they are dead"
Funny things kids say
Here is the full list of funny quotes. These sayings come from the kids at my local school, reader submissions and aggregated from all over the Internet. I'm hoping to make this one of the largest collections of funny kid's sayings around.
You can also add your own sayings, or view 5 random funny quotes!
Say yes
Dad: Do you want the long answer or the short answer?
Kid: I want the yes answer!
But you hate snakes!
My husband hates snakes. Hates them. One day he was watching Monster Quest about giant anacondas. Elly saw this when she walked in the room and said, "Dad, if you're afraid of snakes, why are you watching this?" it was just so funny the way she said it.
Preglet
My 2-year-old asked if only preglet mommies got to wear preglet shirts (maternity)! At the time I was "preglet" myself and thought her word was a little too close to piglet. I've since embraced the cuteness!
Buckle me out
My 2yo, as soon as we arrive at our destination in the car, yells "Buckle me out!" Because obviously, the opposite of buckling someone in must be buckling them out.
Beep duck
When my oldest was little, he called the Roadrunner a "beep duck."
Little bras
My daughter got me with a zinger this morning. She turned 3 on Saturday, so much of the conversation at our house has been about what a big girl she is now.
As I was getting her dressed for preschool, she looked up at me and asked:
"Mommy, now that I'm a big girl, am I going to get a bra like you?" It was all I could do to keep a straight face. I explained that bras are for really, really big girls, like mommies.
Her response: "Why doesn't daddy have a bra?"
I couldn't resist the giggle, but I tried really hard to explain in simple terms that daddies don't have breasts and don't need them.
At which point, she said, "I have breasts, and that's why Santa's going to bring me a bra."
Not worth arguing about that with a 3-year-old. I just hope she forgets about it by the time Christmas rolls around.
Whose underwear?
Amie: What are you doing?
(I was looking for clean underwear in a laundry basket)
Me: Looking for underwear so I can take a shower, but can't seem to find any.
Amie:Maybe Daddy is wearing them.
LOL I cracked up so hard and she just smiled at me like "what?".
Love
Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss
Not my friend
My friend's son has been telling me I'm his best friend for a couple of weeks. Then I told him off for snatching a bill from my desk, and ripping it up. He quite sternly told me I'm not his best friend any more.