Funny things kids say

I baby-sit for my neighbors' kids and one day I was taking care of their 4 year old son. I think we must have been watching cartoons and the word "ego" came up. So their son turned to me and said: "What's an ego? Is it this?"
And he pointed to his crotch...

I took my nephew upstairs to use the loo, and he said to me "Auntie Lizzy, do you have a winky?" and I said "No, because I am a girl" and he replied "Oh, so you have an udder like a cow then!"

My son was telling me about the good ol' days. We were in my parent's basement and I found a pair of pj pants from when he was a baby. I picked them up and told him that he used to fit in to those when he was just a little baby. He sat down beside me, put his head on my shoulder and became teary eyed and said "Yeah, Mommy, those were the good ol' days."

"The worsest injury you can get is a double blood nose, a split lip and a broken arm. You'd die from that for sure."

My two year old has been pooping in the tub lately. When I asked her about the latest time she said "No" and pointed to the dog and "babble babble babble". She tried to blame the poor dog for the poop in the tub!!

I have realllllly long skinny toes and I was asked why God put fingers on my feet.

My mates little boy is 2 years old.
He went into the kitchen one afternoon and we heard him moving a chair and being very quiet so we went to see what he was doing. He was standing at the sink pouring a whole bottle of fabric conditioner down the drain. Then he turned around and put the bottle down. My friend picked it up and asked him why it wasn't full.
"Daddy did it!" came the reply and he pointed out the kitchen window.
His dad doesnt live there and he hadn't been round for 4 days...

My dad got remarried & had 3 more kids, when we were out at a restaurant the oldest (who is now taller than I will EVER be) had to use the bathroom so he said: My penis has a headache! (my step-mother figured she should teach him the proper name for body parts, I think she stopped with him!)

My 11 year old was talking back to me, so I sent her to her room. My sister-in-law was there, and my 2 year old was sitting on her lap. My in-law asked her "Is Mommy gonna send you to your room too?" and my 2 year old said "No, she wuvs me."

My son has recently been obsessed with his bellybutton. Everytime he has a diaper change he immediately pokes his finger in it. He'll even lift up his shirt and bend over just to find it. However, he can't quite say bellybutton just yet. He calls it his...
BellyButt!

Yesterday after hubby and Jack got home from buying a sled and playing in the snow...
Mommy: Jack, did you go to the store with daddy?
Jack: Um yes
Mommy: What did you get at the store?
Jack: I got an itch!
Mommy: Where do you have an itch?
Jack: Right here in my pants! (stated while scratching his butt)

When my son was little his sister gave him some vanilla ice cream. He very seriously said, " sorry, Sissy, but Jesus made me like chocolate!"

The funniest thing I've ever heard was from my cousin. She was about 4 and I was dressing her for the day. She picked out a pair of underwear and I said "Those are sooo cute! Do you think they'd fit me?" (I was joking because she was reluctant to put them on). She said "No, your butt is too big. Kinda like grandma's."

My daughter, when she was about 9, was asked to name parts of the body for homework once, the more obscure the better. So to encourage her to think about it too, my mum and I asked her to say certain words.
We suggested the medical word for skin, which is dermis. To get her to think we said, 'What do you call a thick person?' to which she replied, 'A der?'. We then asked, 'What do you call a lady that's not married?'
She said, 'A virgin?'
Ah, the innocence of youth!

Josiah was industriously walking a line toe to heel and counting under his breath. When he got to seven, he announced, "I saw a snake seven feet long yesterday!". Thats 2 and a half feet long when you don't have such small feet.

My three-year-old was sitting at the table having breakfast.
My husband tripped over his fire truck riding toy, and Ethan promptly hops down from the chair and moves his truck from the middle of the floor to his toy room.
He then says, "I moved my fire truck out from the middle of the floor so you won't trip over it and fall down."
My husband replied, "Thank you, Ethan. That was so thoughtful of you."
Knowingly, I replied, "Were you concerened daddy might fall over?" Ethan said, "Yes. I dont want him falling on my truck and breaking it."

One of my foster kids got some bug bites playing outside. He said " now I look like a dalmation".

Me: What's this word here?
Boy in Class: Fyoomuns. You know...a fyoomuns.
Me: ???
Boy in Class: I spelled it.
Me: So I see, well is it some sort of club?
Boy in Class: no, I'm a fyoomun.
Me: oh?
Boy in Class: We all are fyoomuns.
Me: *slaps own forehead* You mean a HUMAN?
Boy in Class: Duh Miss!

When we got a new puppy one day I came into the room where my son was playing with him. He was saying..."Now, son, you behave yourself!"

My daughter age 5, was watching Barbie and Ken and when they kissed in the movie she looked up and said to me, "Does he love her now?" and I said "aww yes of course he does" and she said "well why havn't they taken their clothes off then?" I was speechless.