Patient: Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a pair of curtains.
Doctor: oh, pull yourself together.

Patient:Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a pack of playing cards.
Doctor: I'll deal with you later.

Patient: Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a snooker ball.
Doctor: Please get to the end of the cue.

Patient: Doctor Doctor everyone keeps ignoring me!
Doctor: next!

Patient: Doctor Doctor the invisible man is in the waiting room
Doctor: Tell him I can't see him.

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A: He was felling crummy!!

Q.Why is the tomato blushing?
A. It saw the salad dressing

Q: What is the longest word in the word?

A: Smiles, because there is a mile between two S's

knock knock.
whose there?
a car.
A car who?
A car-toon.