Q: How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge?

A: ...footprints in the butter

One day the elephant was taking a bath. The ant come in his bathroom and said to the elephant to stand up. Then the ant says sit down.
Elephant was angry. "First you say to me stand up, and then you say to me sit down. Make up your mind".
The ant says "I was just checking that you are not wearing my underwear".

Q: How many words are in The Complete English Dictionary?

A: Four!

Q: What do you do with a green monster?

A: Put him in a bag until he ripens.

Q: What goes up when the rain comes down?
A: An Umbrella.