Patient: Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a pair of curtains.
Doctor: oh, pull yourself together.

Patient:Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a pack of playing cards.
Doctor: I'll deal with you later.

Patient: Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a snooker ball.
Doctor: Please get to the end of the cue.

Patient: Doctor Doctor everyone keeps ignoring me!
Doctor: next!

Patient: Doctor Doctor the invisible man is in the waiting room
Doctor: Tell him I can't see him.

Q: What is the difference between a jeweller and a jailer?

A: A jeweller sells watches and a jailer watches cells.

Q: What's a duck's favorite snack?

A: Quackers!

Q: What do you all a sleeping bull?

A: a bulldozer

Q: How do you know that carrots are good for your eyes?

A: Ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?